Wow...it's 9:15 AM and all is quiet in the house. The kids are just getting over being sick AGAIN, so I'm letting them rest as long as they want this morning. I have a little free time, too. :) I was up last night upset about my childhood friend that I told you about in the last post. My Mom sees her husband and youngest baby at church, so she keeps telling me that he asks for his mother every time she sees him. It's hard to get that image out of my mind, and it has made me sad. I spent two hours taking apart and putting together the kids' train set because it helps me to think. Making something also is therapeutic for me. After that, I got out my bible and read and prayed. That seemed to help even if I did read from Job.
Maybe this is wrong, but the book of Job has always seemed so unfair to me. With my friend's suicide, I keep saying to myself "why does God let this happen?" It's the same feeling sometimes when I wonder why my Dad died. Right after he died, I don't remember who it was, but someone told me that it was meant to be. I just can't believe that terrible things like this happen for any good reason. Have any of you ever struggled with this? I want to go to church, but I'm a little mixed up on what I believe right now. I can't stand sitting through a service with a preacher spouting off things that I can't believe. I guess that's food for thought for another time. I hear a little boy waking up. :)
1 comment:
You know that I go to church every Sunday and that is not always easy. There are always a million reasons not to go, but I feel that it is good for my kids and for me. The thing about the bible is that are things that you have to think about while reading. First off, the Old Testament was not written down as it happened;it was passed from generation to generation much like folklore. So some things are left to intrepration. The new testament was written much closer to the actual happening, so it is somewhat easier to follow.
I would suggest that you try to go to different churches and find one that you are comfortable with. I am not the religion that I grew up with, so I understand your quandry. I don't like the hypocrites that you find in many churches. It really bothers me. I think that your religion should teach you about finding your way, even if you struggle along the path. Anything worth having, is worth working for.
This past week at church we heard about the Prodical Son. That story has always bothered me, so I know what you mean. I always have a hard time understanding why this father takes his son back with open arms after he has squandered his inheritance and done all sorts of bad things. I can understand why the other son gets annoyed with his father. The lesson that we were to take away from this I guess was to love the sinner not the sin, because we all sin. Anyway, I think it is a strange story.
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